


Got Your Back

by spaceenchantress



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars - The Force Awakens, Star Wars - The Last Jedi - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Medieval, And so do I, F/M, Fake Marriage, Kylo has a sailor mouth, Murder, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rey has a sailor mouth, Rey has a secret, Sexy Times, Slightly Dominant Kylo, Slow Burn, Touch Aversion, Violence, bodyguard kylo, cursing, fluff angst and smut, going on a journey, they both have baggage
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-21
Updated: 2018-04-25
Packaged: 2019-04-25 22:46:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14388693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spaceenchantress/pseuds/spaceenchantress
Summary: Rey has a secret. She needs to go on the run and she needs a bodyguard. Enter Kylo, a sarcastic, dark mercenary. For a fee, they will journey together, pretending to be man and wife to avoid suspicion and the ramifications of an unmarried woman traveling alone with a man. Will they be able to stand each other long enough to finish the trip?





	1. A Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Hello fellow Reylos. This is my first fanfic. I have been an avid reader of fanfiction for years, but this is my first foray into the medium. I love adventure stories, so I thought I would create one with Rey and Kylo/Ben. Please comment and let me know what you think. 
> 
> Also, I don't currently have a beta, so please let me know if you are interested. Right now I am running things by my poor mother. And I would rather her not have to read my sex scenes, lol.
> 
> I went back in time to include the following note. I will have it on the next chapter as well, just wanted to make sure everyone saw it.
> 
> ***If you are triggered in any way by child abuse, sexual abuse, or violence, then this is NOT the fic for you. I am not going to be able to warn you about it every time as it is going to be a recurring theme in the story. I am going to have fluff but there are going to be some dark scenes. I would just hate for someone to read this only to become incredible upset.***

The air was hazy as she looked around, thick with smoke and pungent with sweat and grime from the patrons scattered around at tables and the sticky bar. She pulled her hood tighter around her face as several of the pub's inhabitants looked curiously her way. She was here to get a job done. She had heard the rumors about a traveler  that would do work for coin. But not just any work. No, he did the kind of work you pay under the table for. Work done in the shadows and alleyways, with bright and thirsty blades. She wasn't sure what had brought him there, but it had seemed the answer to her predicament. So, she had entered the seedy pub, that was the usual haunt for miscreants and vagabonds, to search for this deadly answer to her prayers.

There, at a table near the crackling fire, she saw a hulking shadow of a man who seemed cleaner and younger than the usual clientele, though he was certainly older than her 19 years. He had yet to accumulate the scars and lines that a man in his profession inevitably collected. He seemed to take pride in his appearance, his cloak was black and simple, no decoration adorned it, and yet it seemed to be made from thick and expensive cloth. The hood was pulled forward, obscuring most of his face. All she could see of it was a prominent nose and lazy waves of dark hair.

He was so large that Rey was momentarily afraid, wondering if approaching this dangerous and capable man was folly. But, she thought of her situation and pressed on. She pulled the chair from the other side of the table he was reclining on, spinning it around to sit with her legs straddling the back. She looked towards him and gathered her nerves to breach the silence before her.

Without even lifting his head to look at her, he interrupted her thoughts.

"Go away."

His voice seemed a bit gruff from disuse but was otherwise deep and pleasant. He had none of the drawled intonations of the ragged peasants surrounding him. His voice almost seemed aristocratic. She took it in and found it in herself to reply to this giant man who shooed her as if she were a fly, without care or concern.

"No."

Her voiced stayed strong. None of her apprehension seeped into her speech as tremors or squeaks. She might not be from this underworld, but she didn't scare easily. At this he finally looked up, the light licking across his face from the fire. She saw pale skin, and dark, guarded eyes staring back at her. He looked vaguely menacing. Not cruel but clearly versed in violence. And yet there was something behind his eyes. He seemed bored and irritated, but there was clearly intelligence there. And, though this might be imagination, warmth. She cleared her throat and beat back the unfamiliar rush of attraction at the sight of him.

"Shall we do business, or should I take my coin elsewhere?"

 

* * *

 

Kylo stared at the young woman before him. Her voice had a lilting quality to it and her gaze was firm and unyielding. Her lips were unrouged, her eyes free of kohl or pigments, and the only color on her cheeks seemed to be from the heat of the fire. Not a bar fly or a woman selling her body then. Since arriving in this town he seemed to be approached by insipid women, looking to get a piece of a stranger, or cocksure men, who thought they could impress by challenging him to a fight. She appeared to be neither. Her features were delicate; light brown hair tied back from her face. She wasn’t short, but he still easily dwarfed her. Her hands lay before her on the table, they looked like they had seen some honest labor. Still, he had come to this establishment for some libations and rest. He had enough coin to last him for the moment, and hadn't planned on taking on any new jobs for awhile.

But looking at this woman, with confidence beyond her years and an appealing countenance ( a little unrefined but who was he to judge), he sighed and decided to at least hear her out.

"Go on then, I don't have all night."

This was a lie. He did have all night. He hadn't planned on returning to his rented room until the buzz in his head drowned out the dark thoughts that plagued him. And with a man his size, and piss as watered down as this was, that was going to take awhile.

"I need to make a journey. It would be dangerous for me to go alone. I would like to hire you to accompany me until I reach my destination."

He scoffed at that.

"Do I look like a a caravan leader? A traveling minstrel? Girl, you are in the wrong place."

Her eyes narrowed, looking steely into his.

"My name is Rey, not Girl. And it would be 60 silver pieces once I’ve reached my destination safely."

He had to struggle to keep from gaping at her. Where did this waif of a girl get 60 silver pieces? This wasn't a murder or an extortion job? Something had to be up.

"First of all, I will take half now and the other half after the job is finished. And that is if I decide this job is worth it. How far are we going? And why don't you convince some poor farm boy with a toss of your hair and a quarter of the coin to take you?"

"I am looking for someone capable, who isn't afraid to get his hands dirty if necessary. The journey is over the mountains to the Fey Woods. I would need some help to establish myself and then you would be free to be on your way. Two weeks, three weeks tops."

His eyes narrowed suspiciously. He was sure there was something more than what she was telling him. But she could keep her secrets as long as he got paid. He was itching to get out of this backwater town anyway.

"Deal. When are you looking to leave?"

"I would like to leave as soon as possible. I already have my supplies prepared. I can leave as soon as you’re ready. I know it is short notice but I would prefer to leave before dawn."

So much for his plan to drink himself into oblivion. Still, for that amount of coin he could put up with more inconvenience than that.

"Fine. We shall meet at the stables at 5 then. Is this acceptable? And I assume you have a horse?"

She looked startled for a moment before shaking herself out of it.

"Yeah, yeah, I can get a horse. One small hiccup though."

He sighed, really hoping that she wasn't more trouble than she was worth.

"What's that?"

"I don't have a place to stay. I have my supplies secured, I can reach them in the morning, as well as fetch the horse. But let’s just say I wouldn't be welcome in the house where I was living."

"So get a room here? How is that my problem?"

"Judging by the state of the stables I would say this place is full up. And to avoid unwanted attention we are going to have to masquerade as a married couple. I can't very well tell people that as a young woman I am travelling unchaperoned with a man. We might as well begin that charade now."

He looked at her and then started chuckling at her earnestly. She glared back at him as he tried to quell his laughter.

"I don't see what is funny."

"You are asking, if I am understanding this correctly, to stay the night in MY room?"

He smirked, his eyebrow raised as he leaned over towards her, nose almost brushing hers as he spoke again.

"I might be willing to haggle on the price a little if a sweet thing like you is going to be warming my bed."

The slap rang out, startling some of the more sober patrons who looked over in interest. Rey glared back at them until they returned their gazes back to their cups and companions.

"I am not, nor will I ever be, someone who trades my body for coin. If this is an indication of the sort of thing you expect then maybe I will snare a farm boy after all."

Her breath was heated, her skin flushed, eyes glinting dangerously. He didn't want to admit it, but she was getting under his skin. He could just imagine her face flushed from other exertions, that pretty little mouth parted in pleasure. Where had that come from? He shook himself from his sudden fantasy to get back to the matter at hand.

"Sorry sweetheart, I had to tease you. I assure you I meant no disrespect. Honest. My name is Kylo. You are welcome to sleep in my room, but if you snore I am putting you out in the hall, deal or no deal."

Why was he going along with this? Girl from nowhere, with no recommendations from other clients, obviously hiding something. Having to pretend to be her husband in public. This wasn't the sort of thing he did. He was cautious, careful. He liked all the details, the whole picture. He certainly didn't put on a show for people. If anything he just tried to avoid them.

So why was he willing to go against his better judgement and help her? It wasn't that she was a woman. He'd had plenty of women flip their hair and smile coyly while detailing how they wished him to snuff out the life of a rival or husband's mistress. And he was perfectly fine with refusing them to their faces, watching them screw in anger and shock that someone had said no to them. But maybe that was the appeal of Rey. She showed no hint of trying to manipulate him, or use womanly wiles on him. Her cloak hid her body from sight, not trying to put on a display. She seemed a capable and practical person. Her face relaxed as she realized she wasn't being propositioned.

"I'll have the first part of your fee tomorrow morning."

She slumped against her chair, obviously relieved that the deal was struck. She tried to cover a yawn as her eyes fluttered.

"You are tired, here is my key. I am in room 3. And I mean it, no snoring or hogging the blankets or you are out on your ass."

She rolled her eyes as she stood up, stretching her arms above her head. Kylo watched as she crossed the room and disappeared into the stairs.


	2. Bed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, just wanted to say a couple things
> 
> First off, I am blown away by the response I have gotten for this first chapter of this fic in just a day! Thank you, thank you, thank you for your comments, bookmarks, and kudos! I was pretty nervous to post this and I have been so excited!! 
> 
> A word about the fic. This story is set vaguely in the middle ages. But it isn't always going to be true to historical fact. I am not a historian, and sometimes I am going to bend things to fit the story. I want Rey to be able to wear pants and own property if she wants to. I just wanted to warn anyone one who thought this was going to be a legit historical romance. 
> 
> ***If you are triggered in any way by child abuse, sexual abuse, or violence, then this is NOT the fic for you. I am not going to be able to warn you about it every time as it is going to be a recurring theme in the story. I am going to have fluff but there are going to be some dark scenes. I would just hate for someone to read this only to become incredible upset.***
> 
> Whew, ok, to the chapter. Please note that I didn't have anyone to read over this so if there are mistakes I do apologize.

Rey trudged up the stairs; the anticipation and adrenaline finally ceasing left her feeling exhausted. She looked at the key in her hand, and thought of its owner. She wasn’t sure what to think about him. He wasn’t quite what she expected. When she thought of mercenaries, she thought of greasy grizzled men with gold teeth they picked with their knives. Perhaps that was just a stereotype. He had certainly seemed willing to take her money. She wouldn’t call him friendly. But he didn’t seem as harsh and unfeeling as a man in his employment would typically be. 

She walked down the short hallway, glancing at numbers, until she found his room. She entered to find a decent sized bed, a trunk at its foot, two side tables, and a small vanity with a mirror. There was not really room for two people to sleep, aside from on the bed together. She sighed, then stripped off her cloak and her riding boots. She debated whether or not she should take off her tunic and sleep in just her shift. Would Kylo think she was a loose woman and attempt some sort of advance on her? She didn’t really know how to act around strangers. She hadn’t been allowed to leave the orphanage, not even allowed to go to church. In the end she decided to err on the side of caution, and kept her tunic on. She carefully took down her hair and massaged her scalp. 

There was a part of her that wanted to flee the room and just go sleep in the stables. She was used to sharing a room and a bed with lots of other orphans, but this was completely different. This was a man. And you couldn’t trust men. So she pushed the blanket over to the other side of the bed and put her pillow in the middle as a barrier. That was more symbolic than protective though, so she kept her knife tucked in her sock where she could reach it easily.

She lay on the right side of the bed, her mind wondering. She thought back to Kylo. She only had experience with one man in her life, and Kylo was radically different. She was glad for it. There was something about him that interested her. He was a large man, and for some reason that appealed to her in a way she never thought it would. Men were trouble and big men were bigger trouble. Still, he didn’t strike her as someone that would use that size and strength against her. His dark hair and goatee contrasted nicely with his pale skin. And then there were his eyes. They were warm and brown and told her things she wished she could believe. 

But it didn’t matter. If life had taught her anything, it was that no one stays unless they were getting something to make it worth their trouble. All Kylo wanted was the bag of silver she had promised him. When the journey was over, he would leave. There was no sense in getting used to having him around. She needed to focus on the future at hand. And she needed to get out of Jakku. Kylo was nothing but a means to an end.

With that thought in mind, she rolled over, pulled her cloak on top of her, and let her exhaustion take her.

 

* * *

 

 

She snored. That was the first thought to hit him as he opened the bedroom door and walked inside. It wasn’t a loud snore, he could certainly sleep through it, but it was unmistakably a soft, breathy snore. She was sprawled out on the right side of the bed, head on her arms, slender legs uncovered by the cloak she had a deathgrip on. He cocked his head and watched her for a moment. She had taken her hair down and now it wrapped around her like a veil. Her shapely legs had muscle that must have built up doing manual labor. And her face was peaceful, not scrunched and stressed like before.

Something about her lying there in his bed appealed to him. He wasn’t sure why. He had always valued his privacy and the few times he had brought a woman to his room he had sent them out the door when they were done. He wasn’t usually sentimental. But something about her looked so innocent and precious, and he felt the urge to keep her safe. He supposed it was a good urge to have, given the assignment. But it wouldn’t do for him to get attached. She was just another client. If only he could convince his baser instincts of that.

He kicked his boots off and sat gently on the bed, careful not to wake her. He pulled his shirt over his head and it joined the boots. Next came his pants. He briefly thought that it might bother her to wake up to a mostly naked man, but if that were the case she could have damned well slept in the stable. He needed to get some good sleep before getting up so early and getting on the road. 

He laid down next to her, slipping the blanket over him as he eyed the pillow wall. He pretended that he hated her snoring, and the room she took in his bed. He sighed, and closed his eyes.

  
  


He hadn’t been asleep long before he woke to the sound of whimpering. He was instantly alert and looked over to Rey’s side of the bed. She was still asleep, but she was obviously distressed. Her face looked scared and in pain, and she was starting to thrash around.

 

“No! Please, no! I’ll be good. Don’t!” she murmured plaintively. 

 

He debated on whether he should wake her or not. He didn’t know her, she might not take kindly to him putting his hands on her.

 

“Rey!”

 

She just continued to cry, stuck in her nightmare. Kylo cursed “Damn it.” 

 

He really didn't want to get involved in her personal life but she seemed so terrified he couldn’t just lay there and listen to her suffer. Lord knows he’d had his share of night terrors. So he moved the pillow from between them and leaned over her. He put his hands on the top of her shoulders and shook her gently.

 

“Rey! Wake up!”

 

It took a few more shakes before she was instantly awake. Both their eyes widened as she suddenly panicked, arms whirling to get out of his grasp, her legs pushing her further away from him. He blinked and found a knife being held at his throat.

 

“Take your fucking hands off me!” Rey hissed, her body tense with alarm. She looked positively feral in her outrage. 

 

Shit shit shit shit shit. This was exactly what he was worried about, well, not exactly this because he didn’t think she would be armed or scared, just assuming the worst of him when he was only trying to help. 

 

“Calm down…” he said as soothingly as he could, his hands up in peace as he watched her breathe raggedly, eyes trained on him.

 

“Don’t tell me to calm down!” she snapped. But the words did seem to have some effect, her limbs relaxed just a little bit, her heart rate slowing.

 

“Rey. Do you have nightmares often?”

 

She looked taken aback by his question, looking down for a second as she took in the scene before her. Some of the hostility left her.

 

“Yeah...yeah I do.” she sighed.

 

“Ok Rey. I am pretty sure you were having a rough nightmare. I only touched you to wake you up, I promise. If you want, I will never touch you again, I just thought this would be preferable to the nightmare.”

 

He made his voice as calm and soft as he could, which was difficult considering he still had a knife to his throat. He thought of how he would calm a spooked horse. What the hell had happened to this woman? She looked at him with wide eyes, visibly calming down.

 

“Oh...oh...I am sorry. I panicked.”

 

No shit.

 

“Look, it is ok, I understand. Well I don’t understand exactly, but it is ok. Everything is ok. I am not mad, I am not going to hurt you, ok?”

 

Jeez, that was too many oks. Oh well. The most important thing was to calm her down and let her know she was in no danger from him. In response, Rey let out a shuddering breath.

 

“Ok… ok. I am ok now. I’m sorry.”

 

“You wanna put the knife down then?”

 

She blinked as if she forgot the knife was even there. She lowered it slowly, though she didn't put it down.  “Oh yeah. Sorry. Did I cut you?”

 

Kylo put his fingers to his neck, checking for blood.

 

“No, I’m fine.”

 

“Ok.”

 

She still looked shell shocked. Kylo wanted to hug her. To pull her into his arms and hold her close until she wasn’t scared or upset anymore. He wanted to hurt whoever had scared her so badly that she slept with a knife. These feelings were new to him. He didn’t understand what about her made him react in this way. He had always distanced himself from other people, he had his own problems. But here he was, just desperate to make this girl feel safe again.

 

He knew that if he tried to approach her now, she would panic again. Something had clearly happened to her and when he found out who had done it he was going to kill them. Free of charge.

 

“Alright Rey, it is still late, there are a couple hours left till dawn. Why don’t we lay back down and try and get some sleep. You are safe. No one is going to hurt you. Let’s just get back to bed.”

 

She seemed more embarrassed than scared now, and sad in some resigned way. Like she was used to being sad and it was just another helping of the same damn thing. It made his heart hurt. Which was a weird thought because he was certain his heart had died long ago.

 

He laid back down, this time facing her, wanting to make sure she was ok but also wanting to keep track of that knife. She laid down as well, with her back to him. But she put the knife down next to the bed.

 

No one put the pillow back. 

 


	3. Morning's Chill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, it's World Book Day! I know it is late, but I wanted to have two shiny new chapters for everyone. I know this isn't quite literature but hey, it's in the right spirit! 
> 
> I want to say thank you to all my readers! I am so stoked to read your comments. I swear, I was smiling all day at work thinking about them. 
> 
> So without further ado, the next two chapters.

When Rey awoke, she did so gradually. Gradually that is, until she realized that the weight on her waist was not, in fact, her cloak. She opened her eyes to find that she had rolled over in the night. She had rolled over and into Kylo’s damn side of the bed. If this wasn’t bad enough, at some point after this his arm had wrapped around her. There was still room between them, but they were close enough that she could feel his breath on her forehead. 

She tried not to panic. If she panicked again he was going to say screw it, and leave. Of that she was certain. She told herself he probably was just as soundly asleep as she had been when she rolled over. If he was going to make a move on her, he’d have done it already, right? No one was trying to hurt her. She just needed to calm down.

As she tried to slow her breathing, she took time to study the man next to her. It was easier to look at him when his eyes weren’t on her. His face looked so different while he slept. Where there was usually tension, his facial muscles had relaxed. The hard line of his mouth, usually in a smirk or forbidding frown, had softened, his lips falling open slightly.  His face and chest were peppered with freckles and beauty marks; she had the odd thought of tracing them like constellations with her fingers while he slept. His hair was mussed, strands of it covering his face. He looked years younger. Something soft passed through her heart at the sight of him, despite the anxiety gripping her. 

She made to pull his arm from her waist gently, but in his sleep he made a grumpy sound and tightened his arm. Rey was torn. Being in his arms this way was a mixed bag. There was a tiny part of her that felt safe and warm and content to just lay there looking at him. It was probably the part of her that wondered what hugs felt like, and what it would be like to be rocked to sleep. It was a part of her that she had tried desperately to bury after years of learning that she was never going to find out. But there was also a very real, very urgent desire not to be touched. Her muscles were rigid and she had to repress the instinct to fight and scream. He needed to move his arm.

She grabbed it and pulled, and again, he groused and pulled her closer. But this time she didn’t let up. She was able to pry it off of her and place it by his side, rolling over to her side of the bed. She laid there with her eyes open, breathing heavily. How was she going to make it through this journey? Maybe she should just risk going by herself. She thought about that possibility for awhile before dismissing it. Even with her knife it was too risky. Maybe if she had more experience outside the orphanage. She managed to get supplies just fine but she had been on edge the whole time, certain someone was going to point her out for a fraud. With Kylo things would be easier. So far he had tried to make her feel safe. If she was completely honest, she wanted to keep that little flutter in her heart she had when she watched him sleeping. 

She sat up and stretched, trying to ease some of the tension in her limbs. She went ahead and put her shoes on, slipping the blade back in her sock. There wasn’t much light to work with, but she put her signature three buns in her hair with well-practiced motions. She pulled her cloak around her and slipped out the door.

 

* * *

 

Kylo woke to an empty bed. He must have been dreaming last night, because he thought he had Rey in his arms. Such a sentimental dream was unlike him. He had felt warm and relaxed. Happy even, which was a change for him. He usually slept poorly, tossing and turning while his head spun, or he got blackout drunk and passed out. It could be an expensive sleep aid, but hey, he made enough coin. To his surprise, though, he actually had fallen into a deep, refreshing sleep. But, when he had opened his eyes, his arms were empty, and he was cold.

Fuck. He sat up and looked around. She was gone. She hadn’t even left a note. Either she was too scared or too embarrassed and had fled while he slept. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. He didn’t know why it bothered him so much. So she left, so what. Sure, he wouldn’t see any of that money but whatever. He tried to tell himself that was the reason his stomach was suddenly in knots. Surely she could have let him know she was leaving?

He couldn’t shake the feeling that she shouldn’t be alone. It wasn’t that he thought she was incapable, lord, she could have sliced his neck last night. It had just seemed like someone had tried to break her. They failed, of course. That girl was fierce. But to say they had left no damage would be a lie. She had hired him to be her bodyguard, but how was he supposed to keep her safe if she just escaped into the night?

He thought back to the dream he’d had. The warmth. He didn’t think he had ever slept that well in his life. He didn’t know what it was about her presence that seemed to relax him (probably not her knife skills) but now she was gone. Just like that. He groaned and fell back into the bed, suddenly exhausted again. Screw it. He was pretty sure the bar wouldn’t sell ale this early in the morning, so he would just sleep until they did.

 

* * *

 

She had made her way quickly through town, making as little noise as possible so as not to attract attention. She walked into the very outskirts where a derelict orphanage squatted. As far as she knew, few people were aware it stood there. The church did, they sent donations from their parishioners every month, but that was probably it. She appreciate the gesture, but not much of that money made its way to help the children that lived there. She had certainly seen no visitors while she lived there, at least, none for her or the others. There was that dangerous looking man, pale and red-headed, that occasionally came to see Plutt. But he always took him into the back office and shut the door. 

It was deathly quiet as she approached. The only sound was a soft nickering from the solitary horse in the stable on the side of the building. She approached it, murmuring soothing noises. One of her duties at the orphanage had been mucking out the stable, feeding, and cleaning the horse. His official name was something stuffy like Maximus but she had always called him Rebel. His coat was red, and his mane was a flaxen blonde color. And despite the lash marks that littered his flanks, he was a calm and friendly horse. If only she could be as unflappable. She patted the side of his head, and moved back to the front door.

She stood there staring at it. The last thing she wanted to do was to go inside. Her instincts told her to run, to flee, to get as far away from this blasted house as she could. But to run, she needed supplies. And the supplies she needed were inside. She would have carried them with her to the pub but there was too much to carry. She didn’t want them stolen, so she had stashed them inside. She was regretting that now. She took a centering breath and went inside.

The stench was unbearable. It went beyond the filth of the room, the grime on the windows, the dirt on the floors. It wasn’t the aging mattress or the disgusting blankets. It wasn’t even the overripe privy. It was none of those things.

The smell came from the body on the floor. The body of Unkar Plutt.


	4. The Body

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***NON/CON RAPE WARNING!!!!***
> 
> ***CHILD ABUSE WARNING***
> 
> Ok folks, this is a rough chapter. It will probably be as hard to read as it was to write. I tried to leave out graphic details but still give you the basic idea of what was happening. I rewrote this chapter completely three times, and edited the hell out of it. But it had to be told. If this is a triggering subject for you, please do not read this chapter. Really this whole thing is going to be difficult. Rey has PTSD induced touch aversion so this is going to be a reoccurring theme. But it shouldn't get worse than this chapter.
> 
> If you want to skip it, please do. I'll include as brief a summary as I can for this story to still make sense at the bottom.

Rey looked at the man on the floor. His corpulent mass was sprawled out where she left him. His sickly looking skin was was loose and shiny. His undershirt was greasy and threadbare, not helping the stench. The reality of it she had avoided the night before, but now the enormity of everything came rushing back at her. This man had been the source of so much abuse. She knew how much his rings hurt when he backhanded her in the face. She knew how strong he could squeeze around her neck. She knew how calloused his fingers were when they grabbed her breasts. And she knew how easily he could make her cry with his pants around his ankles.

 

Unbidden, the memories came.

 

>>>>>

 

It had started out slow. She’d been maybe twelve, she didn’t know her birthday exactly but she counted a new year every January. She had barely started to fill out, her gangly limbs and skinned knees turning into softer hips and a budding chest. His hands lingered just a little long on her shoulders. He’d run his fingers through her dirty hair. Eventually he had her sit in his lap if she wanted to get any food.

She didn’t know what was going on. She was innocent. No one had explained the birds and the bees to her. But she learned. When he started putting his hands in less appropriate places she fought him. She cursed and scratched and threatened to kill him. So he beat her until she could barely stand. That was the night she tried to run away. She had gone to bed fully clothed so she could sneak out, but when she got to the door she saw that it was padlocked. She was trapped. Even when she was outside doing chores he was there watching her, beady eyes on her to make sure she didn’t make a break for it.

Every time it was the same, him sliding his pudgy fingers down her skin, beating her when she fought back. Little by little she died inside. He would whisper to her that all he did was touch her, she was fighting over nothing. She was still a maiden. But that didn’t make her skin crawl any less. It didn’t help her stomach that threatened to revolt. The others kept their distance, probably afraid to associate with her in case they got the same treatment. 

One by one the other children disappeared. She wanted to believe they had been adopted but in her heart she knew that was a lie. People never came to the orphanage to meet them. She’d long had the suspicion that he was selling them off. If that happened to her, maybe it would give her the chance to run. So, she bided her time.

When she got older she prepared to leave the orphanage. Surely as an adult she could leave on her own terms. Plutt hadn’t taken in any children recently, and it was just her left. She didn’t know if she could ever feel clean again, ever feel like she wasn’t some soiled thing that would be shunned by the world if they found out. However, she would rather live in shame than in Plutt’s grasp any longer. But Unkar Plutt had prepared for that. He saw her one day, putting her meager possessions in a bag. And he had just laughed at her, and asked her where she thought she was going. When she told him she was going far away he laughed again and walked up to her, looking smug. 

He had grabbed her arm and pulled her to him, his stinking breath in her face. “I own you girl. Did you think your parents died? Is that the story you have been telling yourself all these years? Girl, they sold you. And not even for very much. You were worthless to them.”

When she looked at him, shocked and heartbroken, he yanked her over to the mattress. “Don’t worry girl. I’ll leave your maidenhead. Can’t very well sell you off without it.” With that he pushed her, kicking and fighting and screaming, down on to the filthy mattress on the floor, and in her mind she went far away. Far far away.

After it was over he let her take a bath. She couldn’t remember if she’d had one before. She scrubbed her skin until it was red and stinging. She looked at the scummy surface of the water in the tub. She realized, this was never going to end. He was going to keep her here until he sold her off, undoubtedly to someone as awful as he was. This was never going to end. She eyed the blade that sat on the desk next to her. His tub was in his bedroom, he had left her there with the assumption that she was cowed. This was never going to end. She leaned out of the tub and grabbed the blade. She dried off quickly and dressed herself, hiding the blade in her sleeve. 

Unkar was in his chair passed out. A whiskey bottle lay empty on the floor by his feet. Rey walked behind the chair, took a deep breath, and slit his throat. The blood pumped out of him in gushes and the air smelled like copper.

She immediately threw up. What the hell had she done? This was the only home she had ever known. She knew how to work hard, she knew how to fight, and she knew how to stretch a bread crust to last for a week. But when it came to the world outside the orphanage, nothing.  Did she even know what she was going to do? They were going to catch her! They would catch her and then they would execute her for murder. 

She paced as she tried to figure out what to do. She had to get out of there, and she had to get out of there fast. To do that she was going to need supplies. How was she going to get supplies? Then it hit her, Plutt was selling the children. He had to have money stashed away. When she thought about it, he was probably holding on to the donation money too. She doubted a man like him would spend more than was absolutely necessary on the children. She ran to his office and ransacked it, finding a bag of silver bigger than a dinner plate. Her eyes grew big. She was gonna get out of here. She thought of the map the church donated. She grabbed it and spread it out on the floor. She looked at the town she was in; the church had helpfully circled it. Jakku. It was on the far right of the map. She wanted to get as far away from there as possible. So, she trailed her finger to the other side of the map. There was a forest there. She closed her eyes and pictured trees rich with greenery, flowers scattered in meadows, a shady brook filled with sparkling water and shiny pebbles. It was marked as Fey Woods. It was as good a place as any, as different from the dry, dull town of Jakku as could be. She looked back at the bag of coins. That was the ticket out. She stashed the silver in a new hiding place and threw on Plutt’s cloak. 

She made her way to town, and gathered the supplies she would need. She tried to appear calm and confident and largely, the shopkeepers didn’t pay her much notice, assuming she was a traveler. She bought decent traveling clothes, a new cloak, quality boots, and bags for her things. While she collected everything she thought she would need, she overheard some of the townspeople talking about a mercenary in town. An eavesdropper by nature, she made herself as inconspicuous as possible and listened in. She knew about mercenaries. They were people who did protection work and the like for coin. She heard them say that he was staying at the Niima Outpost Pub, on the east side of town. 

Rey grinned grimly. She wouldn’t have to worry about someone catching her and taking her back if she had a protector. Someone whose job it was to keep her safe. There could very well be dangerous men after her. She needed her own dangerous man to guard her, and she could learn how to function in the world from him, assuming he agreed. She had no idea what one paid for a mercenary, but she could just say a number and up it if he balked. So she finished her shopping, and walked back. 

She carefully avoided looking at the body on the floor, and the blood that accompanied it. She changed her clothes into a new shift and tunic. She would save the sturdy riding pants for later, when she was out of town. She knew it wasn’t the fashion for a young woman and she didn’t want to draw attention to herself. Getting supplies had been dangerous enough in Plutt’s oversized cloak. She was thankful then for the bath. It wouldn’t do for people to notice a dirty orphan right before discovering Plutt’s corpse. She walked out of the house and down to the pub, hopeful for the first time she could remember.

 

>>>>>

 

Rey felt herself crying. There she was, looking at his body and crying. From what? Relief? Sorrow? Shock? She didn’t know. She just knew she didn’t have time for it. She couldn’t still be here when they found his body. So she grabbed up her stuff and took it outside. She saddled up Rebel and packed the saddlebags, making sure the money was secured and out of sight. She considered burning the orphanage to the ground, but it was better to just leave it be. Plutt didn’t deserve the respect of a funeral pyre anyway. With that she rode off to meet Kylo and get on her way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty, so here is the gist. She looks at Unkar's body, and takes a trip down shitty memory lane. Unkar was abusing Rey as a child. The day before our characters met, he raped her. So she killed him. She found his hidden money and made a plan to get as far away as possible. When buying supplies she hears about a mercenary, so she stashes her stuff and goes to find Kylo. End of memories. She grabs her stuff, steals his horse and leaves to go meet up with Kylo.


	5. First Steps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok guys. I know the last chapter was really dark and rough. I promise that is the worst of it. I know a lot of readers will probably get to that point and stop reading. If you are still with me, thank you! I promise I will make this worth it. So, here, have some angst and fluff.

Kylo was woken up by a heavy object landing on his chest. “Ooof, what the fuck?” He sat up and saw it was a bag of coins, one had slipped out of the bag and laid next to him on the bed, another cold on his bare chest.. He looked up to see Rey standing there at the foot of the bed. She had come back. He just gaped at her for a moment as his brain woke up.

 

“You gonna stay in bed all day? Come on, it’s almost dawn, we gotta get out of here.”

 

“I thought you were gone.” Damn, he didn’t mean for that to come out so defensive and breathy. It’s not as if it were a big deal. He was a grown ass man, he wasn’t going to get all sappy over a girl.

 

“What are you talking about, I told you I had to get my supplies in the morning?” She looked at him like he had horns growing out of his head. Maybe he did. He certainly didn’t feel like himself. He didn’t want to admit it, but this girl was getting under his skin.

 

“Yeah, I guess I thought you would wake me when you left or something.” He said sheepishly, scratching the back of his head. 

She looked at him blankly. “Oh. Uh. Sorry, I guess. I didn’t want to wake you. You said you needed your sleep and you looked pretty peaceful. Didn’t see a point in waking you before I had to.”

 

He supposed that made sense. Honestly, he had forgotten that she needed to gather her stuff. And he was pretty soundly asleep. He sighed, berating himself for jumping to conclusions. Now he just felt awkward. He groaned and pivoted his legs off the bed to get dressed. She turned around to give him some privacy. When he was done he tapped her on the shoulder to let her know she could turn back around. She jumped a little bit, and he cringed. Right. He should probably have just told her he was dressed.

He grabbed up his stuff and followed her out the door. They went down to the stables and got their horses. Rey seemed to have a little trouble getting on her horse, and he stopped to help her up. But she gritted her teeth and waved away his hand, managing to swing her leg over on the next try. He shrugged and mounted his own. His horse was completely black, his coat shiny. His name was Kyber, and he was an impressive beast. He had to be, considering how big his master was. Kylo patted his neck fondly and urged him forward.

 

As they started down the road, Rey spoke softly beside him. “So, uh, do you happen to know how to get to Fey Woods from here?”

 

He glanced over at her, startled. “Why are you going there again?” Thinking back, he didn’t think she had ever actually told him. Really, she had given him almost no details at all. Nothing about herself, why she was traveling alone in the first place, what she was planning to do when she got there. Nothing.

She squirmed a bit before replying. “I needed to move. I picked Fey Woods because it sounded like it could be pretty. I am sick of Jakku. Nothing grows around here. But, I have never been out of this town.”

 

He nodded before replying. “It is a pretty place, to be sure. A little wild, but that doesn’t bother me. You might want to get a dog though, if you are planning on living there alone. There are some fierce animals that way.”

 

“Oh, ok. Yeah, I’ll think about it. I have never had a pet before.”

 

“I pretty much know the way there, as long as we stick to the main roads. I have traveled all over the place. I don’t much care to stick around in one place for too long. I do remember there is a inn a little less than a day’s ride from here, so we can stop there for the night.”

 

“Ok, that works for me. I’ll pay for the rooms along the way, it isn’t going to come out of your fee or anything.”

 

He shrugged. “Whatever you wanna do. What you are paying me is more than fair.”

 

They rode in companionable silence for awhile. He was used to traveling alone, this was the first time he had a job of this nature. Usually it was more a stab in the dark kind of thing. Even as big as he was, he could be pretty damn sneaky. He had killed so many people, they all just ran together behind his eyes. It was just a job, nothing personal, and at this point, it was probably all he was qualified to do. Still, it wasn’t something he actually enjoyed. He wasn’t a sadist. So it was nice to get a gig that didn’t require murder. He didn’t foresee anyone messing with Rey while he was with her. The worst he could imagine happening was an untoward drunk at one of the inns. He would break however many fingers as he needed to, but considering how fierce Rey was he might not even have to. 

 

Honestly, he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to be doing beyond getting her where she wanted to go. This wasn’t exactly typical. He supposed she was right about traveling alone as a woman. Alone she might be mistaken for someone who made their money on their back, getting a lot of unwanted attention. She didn’t have the demeanor of one, nor did she look the part, but people were stupid, and women without a chaperone were immediately judged. He wondered how she did make her money. But, as long as she paid, it wasn’t his business.

 

He decided to try and enjoy this. He enjoyed Rey’s company so far, it should be a mostly pleasant trip. As long as she didn’t kill him in her sleep. As if she heard his thoughts, Rey spoke softly beside him.

 

“I am sorry about last night.”

 

He looked at her, started. “You have nothing to apologize for.”

 

“That’s nice to say, but I do. In truth, I don’t have much experience with men, let alone sleeping next to them. I shouldn’t have assumed that you were attempting something untoward, shouldn’t have threatened you with my knife.”

 

“Look, Rey, you were having a nightmare. You weren’t in control of your emotions right then, I don’t take it personally. Though maybe we can agree not to have the knife in the bed? I promise I will keep you safe, you don’t need it while you sleep.”

 

She looked thoughtful, biting her lip before replying. “I guess that would be ok. If we are going to keep up the charade that we are married, we are likely going to need to keep sleeping in the same bed. I’ll get used to it.”

 

“Rey, if you don’t mind me asking, what was your nightmare about?” 

 

She stiffened, looking straight ahead. “I don’t remember, it was just a dream.”

 

He didn’t believe that for one minute. But if she didn’t want to tell him right now, he wasn’t going to push her. Maybe she would trust him enough later to let him in a little. For now they would keep on their way and get to know each other.

 

***

 

Rey was sore in places she didn’t even know she had. She knew the basic mechanics of riding a horse, but in practice it was completely different. She didn’t know if she was going to make it the whole day’s ride. But her pride won out and she gritted her teeth and kept riding without complaint until they made it to the inn. They took their horses to the stable hands, grabbing their bags and taking them inside. Rey gave Kylo the money for the room, and he went and paid. He walked over to her after the transaction was done.

 

“Hey, I paid extra so we could have a room with a tub. There is a pump for hot water in the room, this is a nice inn. I know you have probably not traveled this far on horseback before, so you can take the first bath. You are probably pretty sore.”

 

Rey was glad for that. She didn’t want to complain and seem weak but Kylo gave her the out she needed. A hot bath sounded perfect, it would do wonders for her tired muscles. She trudged up the stairs after Kylo, almost dragging her bags. He looked behind him at her struggling with them and promptly plucked them out of her arms and added them to his own. Normally, Rey would have told him she could carry her own damn bags, but she was so worn out she was nothing but grateful.

 

“Thanks.”

Kylo just nodded, continuing up the stairs. They made their way into their room, dumping the bags by the wall. There was indeed a large copper tub a little ways away from the bed. Next to it on a low table there was a tray with soap and fresh rags. Kylo walked to the tub and starting pumping hot water to fill it. 

 

“Once this is full, you can go ahead and take your bath. I’m gonna grab a quick ale and come back up. Do you need anything?”

 

“I guess a towel, I didn’t think to pack one of those.”

 

After Kylo had filled the rub, he looked around the room and found a stack of them in the corner. He tossed her one, and another on to the bed for himself. 

 

“I’ll be back before too long, ok?”

 

“Yeah, I’ll be quick. I might head to bed after I dry off. I am pretty exhausted.”

 

He headed out and she turned around and started peeling off her sweaty clothes. From now on she was wearing pants. That would be much more practical. When she was completely naked, she stepped into the tub. She groaned as the heat immediately starting relieving her sore muscles. She scrubbed herself gently, then pulled her hair out of its buns. She tilted her head back and soaked her head, scratching at her scalp. 

 

She relaxed into the tub, the water coming up to her neck. This was the perfect end to the day. She was finally on her way. She was out of Jakku for the first time in her life. It seemed to good to be true. She waited to wake up to find herself still there, still trapped. But no, it was not just a pleasant daydream. She was free. She decided to close her eyes, just for a second.

 

However, she had underestimated her exhaustion, and that combined with the luxurious heat from the water lulled her gently to sleep.

 

***

 

With the pleasant buzz from the ale, Kylo made his way back to the room. He stopped outside the door for a second. Should he knock? She did say she was going to be quick and likely be in bed. He didn’t want to wake her if that was the case. He listened at the door to hear any sounds of splashing but all he heard was silence.

 

So, he quietly opened the door and stepped inside. He was stretching his arms up when he realized she was not in the bed. Oh shit. She must still be in the tub. He managed to keep his eyes averted for a second before curiosity won out. He knew he shouldn’t look but he couldn’t deny he wanted to see her a little less buttoned up. When he looked over, he realized first that she was asleep. She must have been completely worn out. Her head was rested on her arms on the side of the tub. He hated to wake her.

 

But, as he took a step forward to rouse her he saw something that made his blood boil. Her tunic and skirts had covered almost all her skin. But now that it was removed he could see bruises covering her body. Some old and fading, some new and an angry purple. And those were just the ones he could see. His hands balled into fists as wave after wave of anger crashed over him. Without thinking, he barked out “Rey!” She jerked awake, hands fluttering to cover her body. 

 

“Kylo!”

 

“Rey, what the hell happened to you! Who hurt you? Did this happen in Jakku? Do I need to go back there? Whoever it is, I’ll make them sorry for this, I promise.”

 

She trembled in the now cool water. “It’s nothing, don’t worry!”

 

“Rey, this is not nothing! I have never seen someone with so many bruises! Tell me who did this!” His voice was getting higher in his agitation. He was seeing red, and he began to shake in anger.

 

“I uh, I am just really clumsy. I am always tripping on things. There is nothing to worry about.”

 

“Rey, that is a lie and you know it! Now tell me who did this, please!” His voice cracked on the last word, his emotions roiling. He knew he shouldn’t be yelling, but he was almost frantic in his anger and worry over her. It made no sense, she was just a client. He shouldn’t care this much. Especially when she didn’t seem like she was going to open up about herself anytime soon.

 

She covered her face in her hands. “It is in the past, Kylo. Just let it go, please. It doesn’t matter.” 

 

He stood there looking at her. How could she sit there and tell him it didn’t matter? She had been beaten. Repeatedly. Beaten before her previous bruises had even had a chance to heal. And he was just supposed to brush it off? She obviously didn't trust him. Even though they’d hardly had a chance to get to know each other, he felt hurt. He shook his head and turned away. “I’m going to bed.” He took off his clothes and climbed on to the bed, facing away from her, his body tense.

 

She sat there in the water until he got into bed, not saying anything. Eventually she got out, dried herself off, and put on her shift. She slipped into her side of the bed and snuffed the candle on the side table. They lay there in the dark not speaking for awhile.

 

“I’m sorry, Kylo. I am. I just, I just can’t talk about it right now.”

 

He rolled over and faced her. She looked so sad, that same resigned look from earlier. She seemed to genuinely care that she had upset him, but it just made it worse. He didn’t want her to feel sorry, he wanted to find the son of a bitch who had hurt her. He wanted to protect her. He wanted to erase that sadness from her expression, and replace it with warmth and peace. But he couldn’t do that if she didn’t let him.

 

Softly, carefully, he brought his hand up to her face. He looked into her eyes and said “May I?” She didn’t say anything, just nodded almost imperceptibly. He traced down her cheek with his fingers, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. She looked at him with wide eyes, vulnerable in the face of his emotional response to the bruises on her skin. He realized he was just going to have to wait. She’d tell him eventually. He would do whatever he had to in order to get her to trust him. At least until he got her safely to her destination, she was his to protect. And if it was too painful to talk about what had happened to her now, he wasn’t going to keep pushing.

 

He wished he could wrap her in his arms, make her feel safe. It would have helped ease the tight feeling in his chest, the helplessness he felt in response to her shutting him out, not sharing the details of what had clearly been a painful situation. For the first time in his life, he felt impotent. But he knew it was too early for that. He didn’t know if she saw him the way he was coming to see her, but even if she did, it was going to take time for her to trust him enough for that. So he just passed his hand through her hair and down her face, the soft movements lulling her to sleep. Kylo kept watching her until she was snoring softly, taking the time to memorize her features. When he was sure she was out, he leaned forward and kissed her hairline. He tilted his head back down, and stayed so close that their foreheads touched. He stayed that way until he fell asleep.


End file.
